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Because of the insularity of these communities, no formal research into the issue has been conducted. ’”The paramount importance of marriage in these communities cannot be overstated. In their world, the individual doesn’t quite matter as much,” said Samuel Heilman, a sociology professor at Queens College whose work focuses on the social ethnography of contemporary Orthodox Jewish movements. For the men, it’s about Single women have no role in the organized life of this very communal religion.
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They are helping the men and women—especially the women—fulfill the primary social responsibility of their community: to get married.
For the ultra-Orthodox, religious restrictions against the “mingling” of genders prevent singles from taking advantage of contemporary coupling opportunities. Marital aspirants meet almost exclusively through the intercession of like this group in Borough Park.
That scenario, plus the rapid growth of these communities—an estimated 3 percent per year—means more 19-year-old women than 23-year-old men.
The result: Some women in every cohort pass unwed through their conventional prime marrying years.
And while you’re talking, they’re flipping through their lists of guys.” The matchmakers asked for information on men she’d dated previously and for the names of married men she found attractive.
They jotted down everything she had to say, but the grilling yielded no introductions. One solution to the crisis, of course, would be to ask ultra-Orthodox men to marry younger, or to marry women of the same age or older.
middle-aged women gather in the basement office of a brick building in Brooklyn’s Borough Park neighborhood to assure the survival of ultra-Orthodox Judaism.
Black-hatted men and “modestly” dressed women come to them, some young, others less so, all single.
She sat behind a desk cluttered with spiral notebooks, stacks of dating questionnaires, and an old desktop computer that contained her database of single ultra-Orthodox Jews.
Raisy was initially reluctant to talk to me—Orthodox communities tend to be wary of outsiders, and a good Crisis that has in recent years caused a panic throughout Orthodox and ultra-Orthodox Jewish enclaves in New York and New Jersey.
But in a society that values tradition, there remains little incentive for young men to change. Assimilation is the great fear of Orthodox Jews: the loss of their young, and ultimately their identity, to the wider secular society.Tags: Adult Dating, affair dating, sex dating